My blog has 30 followers, Ok I know one of them is me because I did something funny when I tried to comment about a comment, but I think that is quite impressive and I want to say thank you to you all, if you have been, for reading my blatherings. Some of you of course are old friends and family, some are new and some are complete strangers.It's so nice to meet you. There is quite an international spread, apart from good (?) old Blighty, I have readers in France, Germany, America and recently Australia. I apologise for all of my very culturally and age specific references - have you any idea who Cathy McGowan was for example? Well happy googling.
I know for the 30 brave souls who have actually attempted the sign up instructions there are as many, if not more, out there reading anonymously and so I am wondering if I can make a few bob out of this. You are quite a a market and I could raise something for cancer research or just my own restaurant trying fund. I am not a capitalist at heart but it's fun to think about which advertisers may be interested. Quite a few cancer sufferers so maybe wigs or funny hats; lot of you of a certain age so maybe the little blue pills. I could do a regular book review and get Amazon flashing up with " if you enjoyed this one why not try etc etc ". There are lots of food references so maybe Waitrose or Gordon Ramsey's food chain.
There would be that question of trust of course, did this scruff bag really own a Chanel suit or has she just had a backhander from whoever is now running Coco's empire? Did she really slather over that fish or is she getting a cutback on the next family outing? And anyway I am too lazy so no ads.
I do feel a responsibilty to you all, however, and wonder if I need to vary my input. It could be like the Saturday and Sunday supplements. I have made a start on a restaurant review, if I started something immediately after finishing the latest book and I could still remember the odd thing about it, I could write a review. I would try a sports page but don't feel my heart would be in it. Last few weeks would have been " John Terry - who?"; "Andy Murray - thank God and why is he speaking with that Mid-Atlantic accent"; Winter Olympics - "brr". Six Nations Rugby - " Suppose Jeremy is still worth a sidelong glance and maybe I can bother to drag up that fantasy about the tackle to the ground by a 16 stone mass of muscle at full speed, mmm.. with me making sure he stays just where he is?"
I do know that you are all cheering me along in my battle and my blogging so the latest post-chemo news. I only had the three sickies and I am no stranger to those as you now all know. The rest has been sort of rumblings and slight flutters held in chain by the Dom Perignon I am knocking back - old chemo takers joke I suspect, the anti-emetics are called Donperidone or some such chemical nonsense. Last night I made it out to Al Frash for our regular, but not too regular to make it boring, Friday curry. I stuck to the masalla fish and a bit of curried veg and that was no hardship, and only one glass of wine and it all stayed down albeit with a few protests in the night. I wore one of my new headwraps, just as a big headband, a) because ironically my hair needs cutting and it's driving me mad and b) to get my audience used to the Edith Sitwell look that will run alongside the muted down African headress one.
There is one person who does not read my blog, husband of nearly 42 years, Stewart. He says he can't and I don't think I could read his either. He is going to have to put up with more than Edith Sitwell and Winnie Mandela, a lot more and for one he is going to get the full boiled egg bald. But of course my boiled egg look, thanks to my new mate Gok, will be wondrously smooth, warm but cooling to the touch; inside the yolk will be luscious just waiting for a hot buttery soldier to pierce its very soul. And that readers is all you are getting from the "Adult" section of this week's supplements.